I’m a 51-year-old cougar dating a man 20 years younger – people call me a sugar mama but HE struggles to keep up with me

51-year-old salon owner defends relationship with 20-year-younger boyfriend from Netflix show, insisting he struggles to keep up with her in bed and kids could still happen.
51-year-old salon owner defends relationship with 20-year-younger boyfriend from Netflix show, insisting he struggles to keep up with her in bed and kids could still happen.
Vanessa Drozda and her partner, Logan Goodrid. (Jam Press/@vidabeautybabe)
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Vanessa Drozda is 51, owns a hair salon and has a T-shirt printed with the words “Cougar Lives Matter”.

Her boyfriend, Logan Goodrid, is 31.

According to Vanessa, he’s the one who can’t keep up.

The couple met around 18 months ago while filming Netflix dating show Age of Attraction.

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Since then, they’ve fielded the same three questions on repeat: who’s paying, who’s got the energy, and whether children are off the table.

51-year-old salon owner defends relationship with 20-year-younger boyfriend from Netflix show, insisting he struggles to keep up with her in bed and kids could still happen.
Vanessa Drozda and her partner, Logan Goodrid. (Jam Press/@vidabeautybabe)

She had the T-shirt made after growing tired of strangers trying to explain her relationship away.

Ages kept secret until it got serious

The show hid every contestant’s age until couples paired up and asked each other to commit.

Once the numbers came out, either person could walk away.

They didn’t.

“Twenty years sounds huge when you put it on paper,” Vanessa, from Canton, Ohio, told Creatorzine.

51-year-old salon owner defends relationship with 20-year-younger boyfriend from Netflix show, insisting he struggles to keep up with her in bed and kids could still happen.
Vanessa Drozda. (Jam Press/@vidabeautybabe)

“But when you’re actually sitting across from someone and connecting with them, you’re not thinking about a number.

“For me, age wasn’t the attraction; Logan was. I liked how outgoing he is, how we love the same music and activities.

He actually asked questions about me and wanted to get to know me.”

Heels, a bridge and one chivalrous arm

51-year-old salon owner defends relationship with 20-year-younger boyfriend from Netflix show, insisting he struggles to keep up with her in bed and kids could still happen.
Vanessa Drozda. (Jam Press/@vidabeautybabe)

The first move happened off camera. The cast were walking to an event at the resort, and Vanessa had chosen heels for uneven ground.

“I must’ve been a little wobbly on the terrain,” she said.

“Logan approached me and asked to take my arm and help me walk across the bridge. I thought that was very chivalrous!

“Once we got to the building, we got a drink and started chatting. The rest is history!”

The sugar mama rumours

51-year-old salon owner defends relationship with 20-year-younger boyfriend from Netflix show, insisting he struggles to keep up with her in bed and kids could still happen.
Vanessa Drozda and her partner, Logan Goodrid. (Jam Press/@vidabeautybabe)

Off screen, Vanessa spends a surprising amount of time insisting she isn’t funding anything. Logan works as a commodity manager.

“One of the biggest assumptions people make is that I’m a ‘sugar mama,’ which is simply not the case,” she said.

“We both have good jobs, we’re both financially independent, and we both live comfortably.

“Logan is not with me because he needs my money, and I’m not with him because of his age.”

More stamina than her younger man

51-year-old salon owner defends relationship with 20-year-younger boyfriend from Netflix show, insisting he struggles to keep up with her in bed and kids could still happen.
Vanessa Drozda and her partner, Logan Goodrid. (Jam Press/@vidabeautybabe)

In the bedroom, Vanessa claims the age gap runs the opposite way to what people expect.

“I actually have more energy and stamina than Logan,” she said.

“I think that surprises people because they automatically assume the younger partner is going to have more energy. In our case, that’s not necessarily true.”

She once loathed the word cougar. “It always felt predatory to me,” she said.

51-year-old salon owner defends relationship with 20-year-younger boyfriend from Netflix show, insisting he struggles to keep up with her in bed and kids could still happen.
Vanessa Drozda. (Jam Press/@vidabeautybabe)

“In reality, my experience is that the younger man is often the one pursuing the older woman.

“But at some point, I realised people are going to have their own opinions regardless of what I say. Once I accepted that, I decided to lean into it instead of letting it bother me.”

Hence the T-shirt.

‘Suddenly everyone wants an explanation’

Vanessa believes the double standard hasn’t gone anywhere.

(Jam Press/@vidabeautybabe)
(Jam Press/@vidabeautybabe)

“An older man with a younger woman has been done since the beginning of time,” she said.

“However, when an older woman dates a younger man, suddenly everyone wants an explanation or thinks it’s odd.

“We’re seeing the tides change, though. Women are living longer, staying active longer, building careers and businesses, and refusing to believe that their romantic lives have an expiration date after 50.”

Children not ruled out

The couple have deliberately held off on big milestones, preferring to let things “bloom in its own time”.

(Jam Press/@vidabeautybabe)
(Jam Press/@vidabeautybabe)

A family remains possible.

“Another assumption people make is that we can’t have children because of our age difference,” Vanessa said.

“The reality is that if having children is something we ever choose to do, there are many different ways to build a family, biological or otherwise.

“I don’t think age predicts longevity in a relationship at all.

No relationship comes with a guarantee, regardless of the ages of the two people involved.”

Why It Matters

51-year-old salon owner defends relationship with 20-year-younger boyfriend from Netflix show, insisting he struggles to keep up with her in bed and kids could still happen.
Vanessa and her partner, Logan. (Jam Press/@vidabeautybabe)

Reality dating shows no longer end when the credits roll.

For contestants, the broadcast is the first chapter, and the public argument about their relationship becomes everything after it, whether they signed up for that part or not.

Age-gap couples in particular attract a steady stream of online commentary, which tends to follow them well beyond the series.

Older women dating younger men has moved from punchline to programming format, with shows like Age of Attraction building entire premises around the question Vanessa is tired of answering.

For now, she and Logan say they’re in no rush.

Marriage, a baby or just more explaining to strangers at parties. Vanessa has the T-shirt either way.

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(Jam Press/@vidabeautybabe)
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